You Deserve to Know...

Where I've been, what I've been doing, and what's coming.

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I need to get ready for bed, and it’s not even 7 pm yet.

But I’ve neglected all of you for far too long, and I’m fixing that now.

first of all, thank you for subscribing.

I am beyond humbled that you have invested your mental energy with me, and that you care enough about what I do to subscribe. Almost a dozen of you are paid subscribers, which is the fulfillment of a dream I had as a teenager. You are all precious to me.

You’re the only reason I have a chance to do what I love to do. I pledge to you right now, I will not ever take that for granted.

where I have been.

Last summer (as many of you know) I decided to upload a few YouTube videos of my opinion about a stupid Star Wars Show on Disney +. They went viral. At the time, I had only just finished setting up this Substack, and had freshly re-branded my YouTube channel. To say I was unprepared is an understatement.

I’ve spent the last twelve years trying to figure out how to communicate my fiction to the world. All the while, starting and finishing college, ending an 8-year marriage, attempting to start over in a new state, only to return to my home state in financial ruin and get kicked by the Pandemic while I was down.

I had no plan to maintain consistency, only a lot of great ideas. For a while, I thought I could make it work by just doing whatever needed to be done next… it didn’t work.

After four weeks, I was properly burned out. And that broke my heart because I loved all of you so much, and I thought this was going to be yet one more great thing I would try that would crumble in my hands.

I was so ashamed to let you down.

what I’ve been doing.

Last January, my car gave out. I’m not too proud to ride the bus, but in this part of the midwest, living without a car is a huge drain on your time. Busses only run limited hours here, so I have to do chores when the bus runs. So much precious video and writing time is taken up with chores and errands. What takes folks with a car less than an hour, takes me five hours.

I’m also not too proud to pull long hours or take sick and vacation time to publish. And I did some of that this year. I discovered something very important about myself this year: one late-nighter will throw me into a two-day migraine, making writing impossible, let alone video.

My cheap-ass apartment flooded in the early fall. I had to rearrange my whole house as if I was moving.

As the holidays approached, I found out the rent for my cheap-ass apartment was being increased by 1/3. My income does not match that, and there were mumblings of layoffs at my work. Was 2020 happening to me all over again?

Frustrated, defeated, and bitter, I threw my hands up to the Universe. I can’t do this on my own, I told Her. If I’m going to follow my dreams and passions to be a writer and an enabler of writers, I’m going to need help.

Thankfully, life is a cycle and Spring comes after the Winter.

Over the holidays (just a few weeks ago) my prayers were answered.

what’s coming.

Some parts of my life I keep private because personal privacy is good. Suffice to say, I have plans to move into a better apartment with a roommate in the Spring, and she has a car. We’re both on the same page about enabling me to put everything I’ve got into this new era of my life. And that means that very soon, you’ll get a whole lot more of me.

I take personal time off over the New Year holiday to plan the year ahead. This year has been unlike any planning I have ever done. I’ve had to be brutal to my idealism. Gracious to my own weakness. I had to be extra realistic (which I despise—lol). The result?

I actually have a PLAN!

• 2 Hour Livestream Writing Session on YouTube (weekly)

  • Substack Publication of the draft I complete during the livestream

• One blog post/newsletter on Substack (weekly)

• 4 Berserkers Workshops during 2025 (tentatively scheduled for March, June, August, and November)

  • In the future, I hope to raise these to one a month, minimum.

If things go better than expected, maybe Disney Star Wars: The Acolyte, Season Two will be released and my lamentations will bring enough revenue for me to quit my day job. If and when that is the case, the schedule will be modified to bring YOU even more of what you crave from me. Until then, I beg your patience.

Considering that I’ll be moving in the middle of all this (and disrupting my domicile historically throws my whole life into chaos) this schedule is a promise of doing the very best I can, void of all the promises I know I would break for the sake of my own mental health.

your support is everything.

To those I have disappointed, I am ready to earn your trust again.

To those I have seemingly ghosted—I’m here, and your messages are now on my schedule.

To those who continue to hold out faith in me… I want you to know how literally I live on your faith right now.

Thank you all, for being part of this dream come true.

Be on the lookout for the first true blog post in a couple days. After this post, you should get only 2 emails from me per week (one fiction, one commentary).

All My Love,

kmC